So I Married an ADDer

Ouch.

Ring ring.

Erin: Hello?

Jen: Oh there you are! I haven't heard from you all day.

Erin: Yes you have, I sent you an email a few hours ago.

Jen: Oh right, I deleted it because I didn't care.

Check Your Batteries

We keep running into the same problem at our house, which is that Jen (the ADDer) continually thinks things are broken when they just need new batteries. When we first got digital thermostats, we nearly called an electrician because we couldn't get them to work. It took days of inconsistent heat before we tried fresh batteries. Then viola! The thermostats clicked on.

Last week Jen stopped using her favorite electronic meat thermometer because "it was broken." New batteries. Last year, we ordered a new remote control from the cable company to replace the old one. New batteries. Flashlight kicked the bucket. New batteries.

So I implore you to consider, next time you think something is broken, to check whether or not it runs on batteries before you scrap it. Also (and I am terrible at this), it's probably a good idea to keep a stash of AA and AAA batteries around the house.

And, it being winter in our part of the world, take the time to make sure your ADD household is prepared for emergencies, like power failures or blizzards. We have been fortunate so far, but I was thinking last night that if something happens, we're screwed. We have no working flashlights, no bottled water, no non-perishible food, no fire extinguisher, no batteries (eh hem), no nothing. Why? Because it's easy to let that stuff take a back seat to those day-to-day tasks we all have to deal with.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and post a link to a government website. It actually has some easy-to-follow directions for making sure you're prepared for an emergency. So here you go: Ready America.

Now you have no excuse not to be ready the next time you have a power failure!

This has been a message from your local homeowner who is totally unprepared and will surely suffer at the hands of the elements.

Daydream Believer

Jen and I had a brief conversation last night about daydreaming. I had just taken a "life inventory" assessment, part of which asked how frequently I daydream. I circled the highest number because I daydream constantly.

I know that daydreaming is a big component of ADD, and it's actually the thing that tipped off Jen's psychiatrist to her diagnosis years ago. But I don't have ADD, at least not enough symptoms to merit a diagnosis.

So why daydream so much? Old school psychologists used to think that excessive daydreaming could lead to psychosis, and parents were cautioned not to let their children daydream. Others (like my buddy Freud) thought of it as a self-gratifying attempt at wish fulfillment (i.e. we fantasize about what our lives could be like if we won the lottery). But most people would argue that they daydream to ease boredom, like on a long plane ride or a tedious business meeting.

We all have some sort of fantasy life. So why is daydreaming a tip-off to ADD? At what point does daydreaming start to interfere with a person's ability to function? Who can really quantify a person's inner life?

These are things I've been wondering about instead of going through the pile of bills on the table.

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree, What are You Still Doing Here?

The first time I came over to Jen's apartment, it was warm and inviting. The Christmas tree was decorated, there were colorful lights strung from the ceiling, and Punky's stocking was hanging on the mantle.

It was the end of February.

Although I found it sort of endearing, I couldn't understand how someone could tolerate their holiday decorations a full two months after the holiday has passed.

As we got to know each other better and I started visiting more and more, I realized the tree was going to be a permanent fixture in the living room. Eventually I asked if I could take it down myself. Jen was relieved.

I know a lot of people procrastinate taking down the Christmas decorations. It's depressing, because the holiday joy is gone, and also annoying, time consuming, and nothing fits back in its box. Today is January 5th and our tree is still up, but it's coming down tomorrow come hell or high water.

Clearly, ADDers have an especially hard time de-Christmassing. Did you also never put your toys away after you played with them?

I didn't think so.

Merry Christmas in January!

Itchy

Hello and Happy New Year! I'm getting back into my routine after 12 days off from my day job, sadly none of which were spent in a vegetative state watching Law & Order, despite my best intentions.

I want to talk to you about sheets.

I understand that a great number of ADDers are fussy about their fabrics. Some people can't stand having a tag in the back of their shirt, some people can't wear wool, etc. Jen can only tolerate her clothes being washed with All Free & Clear detergent, which has no dyes or fragrances.

A couple of weeks ago, Wal-Mart had a sale on Cheer Free & Gentle detergent. It's nearly the exact same product as its competitor All, which we've been using for years. I washed the bed sheets with the new Cheer and put them back on the bed.

That night, well past midnight, Jen woke me up.

"Did you second rinse these?!"

"Huh? Yeah, why?"

"Because they itch!"

"How could that be?"

"What did you do? I can't sleep!"

"I don't know. Could it have been the Cheer?"

"It must have been. Whatever, I need new sheets."

"What, now? You can't make it through one night?"

"No. I'm itchy. Where are the summer sheets?"

And the next night...

"Erin, I'm freezing. Where is the fleece blanket?"

"What? It's two in the morning."

"I don't care, we've got these summer sheets on the bed and I'm freezing."

And the next night...

"Erin, wake up. Something on this bed is making me itch. I think it's the fleece blanket. Let's take it off and just put on an extra comforter."

And the next...

"I'M SO HOT! How can you be asleep? I need to take all the sheets off and start over."

Mind you, this all started because I bought Cheer instead of All. I could sleep on a pile of broken glass with a burlap sack for a blanket and be just fine. But I'm lucky if Jen can go three nights in a row without needing to change the sheets in the middle of the night. If it's not the detergent, it's the temperature, or the usual  culprit, the sheets not being tucked in properly.

Does anyone else have this problem?